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Date the map and decide together when you’ll dig up your romantic treasure. Create a special music disk together of love or fun songs. It can be as simple as: “I love you,” “I want you” or just XOXOXOXO. Next time you’re at the mall together, jump into a photo booth and take some fun pictures. Serve chocolate liquor in small glassware as dessert to vamp up a romantic dinner. On a special night, dim the lights and put on some soft music. You’ll need confirmation that they can make it so be sure to leave a return number. Next time you’re walking together, grab your love’s hand or walk arm-and-arm. Make a “Prescription for Love” form on the computer. Stargazing is fun, so buy an easy-to-follow book so you can both enjoy the sparkling sky. Buy a smoothie maker and make a couple Pina Coladas or Daiquiris (alcohol or non), then pick a spot in the yard, throw down a blanket and enjoy your very own deserted island. Drive to a nearby town and walk hand-in-hand to enjoy the sights, shops, restaurants or nightlife. A moonlight picnic for two might be just what you need to set the stage for romance. Plant some favorite flowers and when they bloom, you can pick them for your love. Keep in your car or in your desk for a quick pick-me-up during the day. Plant a tree together and plan to carve your names in it when it grows big. You can disguise it in a regular business envelope and it can be funny or/and romantic. Name a star together and when you’re apart; you can look at it and know that your love is waiting for your safe return. Use glow-in-the-dark stars and black lights to create a romantic night sky inside. Create a spa atmosphere at home with candles, essential oils, incense burners, mood music, massagers or other relaxation products. Then undress leaving a trail of your clothes from the front door to the bedroom. Then hand write each prescription using words like…take two doses of love and come see me now, make it more creative and intimate. Spray a heart shape in the grass so your love knows you care. Bury a “Time Capsule” together with trinkets, love letters or other romantic sentimental items. While your love is showering, sneak in and write, “I love you” on the steamed mirror. Take a love letter or romantic vacation brochure and cut it into a puzzle.

And the reason why married people “insensitively” tell you in so many words to do this, is because they know that marriage doesn’t solve all your longings for intimacy and belonging.

This can be a fun place to have a picnic or just hang out together; watching the clouds or stars. Stop at a local coffee shop and spend some “two-gether” time there, or take a long walk or scenic drive in the county. Or even a little naughty if you’re planning a special evening together. Use heart-shaped sticky notes, one or a bunch to post little messages throughout the house or garage to add a little thrill to your love’s life. Pick up some dipping chocolate and fresh strawberries, cherries or bananas and make tonight’s dessert incredibly romantic. Take a long drive and stop at a new restaurant, or a deli to pick up a picnic lunch. Re-label an empty prescription bottle with heart stickers and set the blank prescriptions next to the bottle with a pen so you can both play doctor. Create a romantic slideshow using old photos of you and your love. Get tickets to an event, i.e., game, opera or concert, you know your love is interested in. Get some coconuts, lounge chairs, beach towels and maybe even some sand.

Sort pictures by years and events starting from when you first met until present. Pick out the best ones and frame as many as you want to display on the mantel, coffee table or dresser. They can surprise, create fun, show affection or entice your love. Keep track of upcoming romantic dates and events; don’t use it as your everyday calendar. Send a small gift or flowers to your love’s destination to be received upon arrival. For a personalized keepsake, consign a local artist to sketch you and your love doing something fun or romantic together. Keep some coins handy so when you pass a fountain, you can both make an impromptu wish. Slip a love note in your love’s pants or coat pocket. Keep the location a secret, however, mark your romance calendar so you both keep this date open. Be extra understanding when you’re love has a down-in-the-dumps day. Cut small, heart shapes from colored paper and jot down a romantic message on each.

So if you’re single and feeling hopelessly lost, don’t fret. [Read: Why you can’t find love] You could read huge research papers or listen to therapists about their definition of love and try to learn from them. After all, love isn’t a road map to go from one place to another.

Love is like a magical recipe that changes with each person. There are so many couples who have actually given up on finding love, and carry on their lives talking about fairytale romances and romantic movies with their friends, but they don’t really try to find love in their own lives.

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